Closet Chaos

No, not my closet, you see I don't even have a closet, I have a pile of sweatshirts on the floor of my room, a rod in the storage room to hang a few skirts and Handsome Hubby's plether of button down shirts. Nope, its not my closet chaos I speak of (blog of?), its my daughter's closet, and I really should not complain, all 4 girls share one closet, its not a huge closet, its not a tiny closet, (they shouldn't complain, at least they HAVE a closet!) but this closet is jam packed! Who needs 15 jackets? Or how about 30 skirts?? And the number of puffy vests, in all different colors to match that one shirt that goes with "my favorite jeans!" And boots, oh my for the boots these girls own... brown ~ at least 8 pairs, black (but these I call "hooker heels" and they aren't allowed to wear them anywhere, which begs the question, "why do we still have them in the house??" they only add to the closet chaos. sorry, rambling!), pirate boots, jammie boots (? cuz they look really really cute with jammie pants, why would you need boots that look really cute with jammies?? Do you wear these boots to bed?!? rambling again) dress shoes, a zillion flip flops, btw, I HATE flip flops! They encourage dirty feet in my house, in my car, everywhere. all under the guise of "shoes". Flip flops are not shoes. they don't cover your feet, they don't protect your feet, they don't support your skeletal system ( I don't think that's the clinical phrase, but you know what I mean). Not to mention the tennis shoes, all colors under the rainbow to go with different outfits. And the actual snow boots, not to be confused with the fashionable boots, of course they have them too. Jeans, pants, shorts, sweatshirts, blouses (sorry, I call them blouses, my girls have no clue what blouses are, they call them "dress shirts" informal dress shirts?) Of course they all have dresses too... lots and lots of dresses and cute little sweaters that go with that certain little dress, and matching heels finish up the look. And the scarves, pretty scarves in all different colors. And bags and purses and backpacks (plural. "Mom, the white with orange flowers messenger bag does NOT go with my pink puffy vest! *rolling of the eyes*).
**Now, for the sake of full disclosure, we (they) buy these clothes at GW, or they are given them, usually for babysitting 3 adorable little boys that have a mom with amazing clothes ;) and when they shop at GW its on Tuesdays, Tag Sale Tuesdays, when they buy items for $1.50... so don't think I encourage mindless spending of hard earned money on a $50 pair of boots or a $40 pair of jeans. We don't do that kind of thing.
I think it may be time to take control of the closet chaos... but its so much easier to shut the door and leave it for another day, say.... when they move out???

This is just me, dreaming again ;)

I am falling in love with old farmhouses... the wide planked floors, the beat up baseboards, every nick and ding must have a story behind it. I dream of living in one someday. On an actual farm where I can have an acre garden and barns and a chicken coop and barn cats and a stream that Little Brother can go fishing in. I think we have become a people that don't appreciate the history of the places around us. We want new everything, new cars, new houses, new EVERYTHING!! I have fallen in love with old everything... old cars, old houses, old clothes, old linens, old buttons, old appliances, old furniture ( I have to tell you, it is built so much better than this newer junk they sell! ) The details in older homes is amazing. The woodwork is beautiful, and its real wood! The plaster walls have such character, the doors are solid wood, the wood floors are real wood and every dent and scrape gives it even more character. Leaded glass windows, farm sinks, basement root cellars, drafty windows (no mold problems there!!), and the creaks and groans that these beautiful stately old farmhouses make let you know that it has been around for allot longer than I have been! I grew up in an old stately Victorian style home, the woodwork is amazing, the rooms enormous, the floors beautiful ( even if my dad doesn't agree ;), the high ceilings were meant to keep it cooler in the summer (and it is), the old windows (only a few left) are drafty. The wide open grand staircase is beautiful in detail and craftsmanship, (even tho no one sees it anymore cuz the main entrance that we use would have been considered the kitchen or servants entrance). It has been slowly modernized over the years, some new windows, a full basement put under it, some sheetrock in places, but it still has good bones! I love the doors, and the floors, and the plaster walls and the woodwork, ah, the woodwork...
someday... someday I will have my dream house, not a Victorian for me, but an old farmhouse, that still has good bones.
I guess I will always be a dreamer, but such good dreams I have

Manic Mondays....

Some days I find myself just rambling about nothing, dreaming of something big happening in my life... win the lottery (problem with that one is I would first have to PLAY the lottery in order to WIN the lottery ;), lose weight, have an amazing body, get my hair done, have money to buy clothes that actually fit me, a closet full of shoes, ( I really do love shoes, you would never know it to see my humble collection of 4 pairs of shoes ) get a mani and pedi on a REGULAR basis! ( I have had it done ONCE in my life, a bday present from my favorite auntie :), space and time to work on my sewing and crafts, the money to travel and take a vacation with Handsome Hubby and the Pack... just dreaming again. You know me, I love to dream :)

I dream of being witty and charming and having friends to call up and get together with "just because". I think I may actually be a pretty boring person. I don't have amazing things happen in my life. I have never had any life altering moment occur. You know, one of those "ah ha" moments that you hear about? Yeah, um never had anything like that happen to me.

Just another manic Monday! But you've had those kind of days too! Right?

I want to be like her...

Saying "Good Bye" is such a difficult thing to do. When we know our loved one is going to be in Jesus' arms soon, we know that it is not a time to be sad but to be joyful that they are without pain, that they will once again be totally lucid and not confused, but I can be selfish and not want him to go. Right? I can still grieve and my heart can be breaking for the strong woman he is leaving behind. Seeing her sitting by his bed, with her head lying on the pillow next to his head, seeing her lips moving and tears flowing down her cheeks, knowing she is praying for a swift and painless passing for her beloved husband, thinking that THAT is the woman I want to be like. Trying to imagine the feeling of going home alone, thinking of the preperations that she will be making in the days ahead, not being able to imagine being able to do any of that, yet knowing she will, she doesn't have a choice. So I can be selfish and not want it to happen, not now, not ever. But I know it will, thats part of life. God's plan for all of us. For everything there is a season. That's just the way it is. So I will carry that picture in my heart forever. Of this amazingly strong godly woman sitting by her beloved husband, tears flowing down her cheeks, and seeing her lips moving in prayer. She is my Grandmother. I love her. I want to be like her.

Told you so!

Ok, I told you to give me a couple days and I would have snapped out of it ~ and I did :) This week is much better! I have been keeping myself busy with my garden (STILL!!). Canned 7 qts of pickles today, stopped at the local apple orchard and scored a box of #2 Honeycrisps for 1/4 of the price of #1's!!! Just 3 more boxes to get and I can get my apple butter started and I am thinking about some apple jelly too. I have big plans for next yrs garden... like 4x's the size if I have my way! I want to grow alot of squash, onions, garlic, potatoes, carrots, peppers and fennel :) and rasberry and blackberry bushes, and I want to start an herb garden so I can have fresh herbs all summer and then dry and package it for the winter. I would really really love an apple tree, ( or 10! ) really wish we had planted them when I wanted to when we first moved here 12 yrs ago :P
Have plans for yummy meaty mostaccioli for supper tonight with lettuce salads and garlic toast. Tomorrow nights supper will be beef stew (with fresh garden veggies from MY GARDEN!) and crusty bread of some sort.
I am starting to get Christmas presents turned out already! :) Not for the BP but for family members :)
I love Little Brother! He mowed the lawn today, split wood and is, at this moment, building himself a fort out of wood that he has scrounged around and found :) and did his schoolwork and house chores too! Sometimes I look at my Pack and am amazed by them :)
As you can see all I needed was a few days! I should know better than to blog when having the Sept blues!! Things are looking up and I am looking UP :) Getting my strength and wisdom from HIM ~ that's what I needed to do :)

September Blues

I really should be upbeat and happy, really I should be... but I am finding myself "down in the dumps" more and more :P I hate feeling like this. There is really no reason for me to feel like this. And yet I can't seem to dig myself out of this. I think it would be really nice to have a life. Ya know, a FUN life. Like, going here, going there, doing this, doing that, meeting up with friends (what friends?? that is part of the "down in the dumps feeling" I think), actually having a LIFE! It would be nice I think. But I think you first need to have $ to be able to run here and there, so that isn't going to happen anytime soon :P
I love my Pack, but they seem to be growing up and I don't know what to DO with them! Does that make any sense? Beans is signed up for her drivers' ed class. Baby Sister taught herself how to do front walk-overs last week, in my livingroom, of course. So now you can guess how much more time we spend dodging flying legs every time we turn around!
My garden is STILL producing veggies ~ and I am STILL processing pickles, and freezing carrots, and dealing with zuchinni, melons and tomatoes.
School is in full swing here. Its been more of a challenge for me to keep up with all five of the Pack this year. By the end of the day I feel as if my head is spinning and is so full of useless information from grades 3 to 9 that I just want to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head! I'm sure it will even out and I will get back in the groove.
Maybe I should look for a full time job.... cuz that would answer everything.... ya right. Lets add sleep deprivation to my list of headache triggers. Argh... Can you tell my feet are really itching to wander again? My eyes would love to see new sights. Immerse myself in a new place, new people, new foods, new smells....
Next month is our 15th anniversary. I had big plans for it. Get away from the Pack, spend a weekend in some remote cabin, just Handsome Hubby and I. Now I'm thinking we'll be lucky if we go out to eat for supper. I haven't been able to find anything affordable. Well, its hard to find anything affordable when affordable means "as close to free as possible". Maybe there will be a good football game on that weekend....
Things will brighten up for me soon (give me about 3 days and I'm sure I will be feeling much better ;). Hopefully next week will bring sunny days, and a more sunny disposition for me!!

Hello Again...

Hello My name is Shanan, it has been 2 months since my last blog entry (YIKES!!). I am a horrible blogger and I am very sorry.

whew, now that I got that off my chest I will update everyone on whats been going on at my beautiful little piece of paradise~

We spent a week out at my parents lake cabin. Had SO much fun and the week started out with a BANG!! Literally :P Handsome Hubby was taking all of the Pack out on the wet jets and he decided to get the second one going, it wouldn't start so he figured he would jumpstart it ( he and my dad had done this many times b4 without problems). Well, he didn't realize that there was a leak somewhere and that the gas tank had actually leaked every drop of its contents into the engine compartment, where the battery is located. All 19 gallons of gas was sitting in there. Beans had grabbed the cables for him and handed them to him, they hooked up the first cable and as HH was hooking up the second cable Beans took a step back. Well, it sparked and flames shot up out of the wet jet and HH's hair lit on fire. Beans very calmly told him, "Dad, your hair is on fire." he dove into the water and Beans started splashing water on the wet jet to try to get the fire out. It kept restarting, so she yelled for a fire extinguisher and Little Brother jumped into the pantoon (which was sitting by the dock) and grabbed the extinguisher out of there. (hmm, I didn't even know they HAD an extinguisher in there). He handed it to Beans, she handed it off to HH and he put the fire out. Well, HH staggered up onto the shore and started shivering and shaking. My uncle, who just happens to be an EMT, was staying at the cabins with us and he advised HH that he needed to get to the hospital. Well of course HH denied it, said he was alright, and that he didn't need to go in. he whole time he was putting up an argument we were moving him towards the van, we finally convinved him we should have them check his eyes and lungs to be on the safe side and got him loaded up in the van, wrapped in Little Brother's quilt. So thankful we convinced him!! We got about 3 miles down the road and he started shaking really bad and stuttering. He was starting to feel the pain and we needed to get him somewhere where they could get it under control for him! All said and done we found he had 1st and 2nd degree burns over his face, shoulder and neck. They cleaned him up, drugged him up and sent him home. I was praying that he wouldn't have any pain the next day (pretty impossible with 2nd degree burns I had heard) and guess what?? He woke up the next morning with absolutely NO PAIN!! He took the day off of work, shaved his head bald and spent the day relaxing :) He is still sensitive to sunlight on his face, he has decided he likes the shaved head, and I think all of the Pack now has a healthy fear of fire. We ended up having a wonderful rest of the week at the cabin with my uncle and his 3 wonderfully amazing kids.

Me and my Pack have been kept very busy canning and freezing. pickles, salsa and zuchinni from the garden :) I have also started getting my Christmas sewing in order! I have decided to make jammies for all the Pack and all of my nieces and nephews! I will post pics as I get them done.

School starts on Tuesday for us and I am so not ready for it!! I am not ready to say goodbye to summer, we have enjoyed this summer so much! So many days swimming at the river, spending weekends at the cabin, taking naps on the deck, ice cream runs... BUT I am looking forward to picking apples at the orchard, making apple butter and apple crisp and apple pie! Getting to spend a weekend with HH for our anniversary! (15 yrs! can you imagine!?!?) The crunch of leaves underfoot. The smell of autumn! Deer hunting with HH, hoping to get a doe permit this yr, last year I had to sit and watch 2 doe walk within 5 feet of my stand! The smell of the woodstove burning.... ok, there are alot of things I love about autumn too, the only bad thing about autumn is that it means winter is right around the corner :P

Well, thats about all I have time for today! I had better get back to canning pickles!