Saturday, September 13, 2008

From Homesick to Discovery

I guess you can say I am officially homesick. I miss my mom and dad. I miss my own house, the smells of MN. I miss having a friend to talk to.

We found out that it may be another 2 months before D starts on his hotel. Which means we may be down here a whole lot longer than we had originally planned. Figure the build may take up to 12 months to complete, and if it doesn't start until November.... well you do the math. We are praying D can get the bulid done in 7-8 months like he did in Red Wing, then we have the chance of being home in July or August. Worse case, we'd be home in Nov. of next year.

His boss doesn't seem concerned about the delay. He told D to "enjoy your wife and kiddies". We can look at it as a paid vacation, and enjoy our time as a family. But it is hard to sit back and enjoy when you're not used to sitting back :)

I have been learning to "let go and let God", not an easy thing to do in my obsessive compulsive life. But I can see Him working in my life and in my heart. I can look at this experience and worry and fret, or I can look at it honestly and realize that God is supplying all our needs. He must be up in heaven , shaking His head at me. I know that when I am worrying and freting that I am taking the glory of His works away from Him. I know that I must pray, then give it to Him, and quit obsessing. If I am worrying about it- then I am telling My Father that He is not big enough. But my God IS big enough!! I am working on these things, daily, it seems.

My mom told me something the other day that helped me so much- she told me to remember that GOD sent us down here, not work. That statement freed me from all the anxiouty I was going thru at that time. To remember that it isn't about D's job, its about God's Will for us down here!! To think that we are not crippled by the job at this time, maybe He wants us for something else down here!

I feel as if I am on a discovery, a discovery of God's Will for my life.

I am content knowing that this is where He wants me for now. I will try not to be too homesick. Maybe He is preparing us for something, something that we may not know yet, but something that He has planned for. I am looking forward to seeing my mom and dad next month. The kids want to show them our new life down here. Its so different than our life before- although I think it more of a difference in our hearts, a change that one may only see if they look very closely.

So I very quickly went from "Homesick to Discovery", in just a few short paragraphs, its funny how that can happen:) I am looking forward to all the things that God has in store for us as I learn to give Him the glory, all the glory. And as I learn to let go and let God.

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